Monday, February 16, 2009

no more excuses

Some days I wake up in the middle of the night with all of these ideas in my head. I have tried putting together ideas for a book or 2 or 3 for years now but it just never seems to fit together correctly. Yet that thought is always there. Last night for the first time I simply wrote down my idea & went back to sleep. Now I can't find where I wrote it LOL

I love winter, I love the cold...yet I am craving sprintime & flowers. Again, I have this picture in my head of how I want the front & back yards to look. I cut pictures out of magazines & pasted them together. I know just what I want where....but there is nothing I can do until the ground thaws.

Excuses! There is nothing but excuses in there. I have to learn to take the word "but" out of my vocabulary. Of course there are things I can do! I just need to find them. AH HA! A plan of attack for the day!!

I made a committment to not jump on people when they post tings that are contradictory or flat out lies. It's been a tough one for me because I remember so many things. Only once in a week did I do it....it's the same person that I usually do. My solution has been to just ignore that person. Close my eyes & ignore it all. I am confident that I can make that change for the good.

I am working on smiling more. One of my goals this year is to be someone that others want to be around. It's been a tough road where I forgot to enjoy things, to laugh for real & just be me. Partly I'm sure it's the medication (thank goodness the first one I tried helped the anxiety & depression) and partly my head is clearing of the fog. I can see me again. I love me again!!

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